I have known this for a long time and every time my personal “cashflow” is in danger, I tend to forget this simple truth: “I am really not made for a regular job”. I am annoyed, I am bored after just a few months of anything that in the beginning seems to be new and potentially exciting. Why do I lie to myself, why? I know, in the depth of my heart, I know what it is that annoys me so much about having a regular job – it takes away my freedom!
I can only be creative when I am happy. I can only be happy when I am free. I cannot be free when I am trapped. I feel trapped when I have to be in the same exact place every day from Monday to Friday. I feel trapped when I have 25 days of freedom in a whole year.
What if I feel TODAY like taking my camera and going out there to take pictures beacuse the sky is so beautifully just-before-the-storm dark blue?
What if I feel TODAY like staying in bed and at last pushing forward my short story on three women stuck on the train from its current page number two to page three or maybe even four?
What if I feel TODAY like taking my car to Zandvoort and having a long walk at the sea finished with a fresh herring roll which I would consume sitting right there on the freezing cold sand?
What should I do?
It is Monday and I have to go to work!
It is Monday and I will have to do what I am obliged to do for the next five days!
It is Monday!
Oh, dear lottery, dearest postcode loterij, the most fantastic euromilions, all the greatest lotteries in the world – why don’t you let me win??? Just once! Pleeeeeease!